We hurt because we love
by anjuri
Summary: Deathfic. Really sad if I do say so myself, however please read anyways! Preview: Hibari stared at the open coffin, wanting the ground to rip open and swallow him whole. "What have you done to me?", he whispered faintly. TYL!18TYL!27.


Disclaimer: Katekyo Hitman Reborn belongs to...dun dun dun...Amano Akira (a woman after my own heart) 

The only things that belong to me would be my love for the pairings, and maybe some other things ;)

"What do you want me to do?", Hibari shouted at Tsuna's smiling face. That smile would forever be there, because that was the look etched on Vongola Decimo's face as he died, smiling. Hibari stared at the open coffin, wanting the ground to rip open and swallow him whole. "What have you done to me?", he whispered faintly.

Hibari pounded his fists against the coffin and cursed everyone, everything that had led Sawada Tsunayoshi to his demise, Milliefore, Vongola, the whole world. Tsuna's family were all crying, yet they did not see that they themselves were the biggest reason why Tsunayoshi died. Because he loved them.

_"Hibari-san, I love you", Tsuna called out just before Hibari left for another mission. "I still do not know wether I love or hate you Tsunayoshi", Hibari replied, yet he glanced back at least, just to acknowledge that he cared a bit about what the other man had said. _

_"That's okay Hibari-san", Tsuna smiled at him, "I know you well enough to know what you really mean." It was the same endless pattern with them, Tsuna telling Hibari he loved him, and Hibari replying with his own unique way of saying I love you._

_"I already know why you won't tell me you love me Hibari-san", Tsuna said gently, "the reason we hurt is because we love, therefore to protect yourself, you don't want to love me." Hibari's eyes darkened, "I don't know what you're talking about", he replied as he grabbed his tonfas, ready to shut the herbivore's mouth._

_Tsuna moved quickly and dodged the tonfas, he managed to wrap his arms around Hibari and hug him. "It's okay Hibari-san, I'll never hurt you", Tsuna looked up at Hibari, his bottom lip quivering, "so please don't be afraid to love me."_

'You liar', Hibari thought childishly, 'you said you wouldn't let me get hurt. You said to not be afraid to love you.' Hibari glared at the man in the coffin who looked like he was just asleep, "don't say things you don't mean, don't make my heart hurt anymore", Hibari kneeled down and kept banging his fists on the coffin, "wake up and make it stop!" None of the other members of the family paid attention to what Hibari was doing, they were too busy making scenes and crying out, just like him.

'You don't know me, otherwise you would've known that I did not want this', Hibari thought angrily, but Hibari knew that was the very reason why Tsuna had gone to meet Milliefore while he was away on another mission. Because that way he wouldn't follow.

_Hibari looked at Mukuro and growled, "Tsunayoshi is mine, don't ever touch what belongs to me." Mukuro had laughed his trademark laugh, and innocently replied, "he can't be yours forever", before walking away from the door of the Vongola Decimo's room._

'Forever', Hibari thought, 'You were supposed to be mine forever.' Hibari wanted to destory that which was taking Tsunayoshi away from him, but it was impossible. How can one man destroy the earth? So he watched as the coffin was lowered, and he watched as his beloved was welcomed into the open arms of the freshly dug soil.

_Hibari had once asked Tsuna why he did not mind, even though Hibari had told him he couldn't differentiate between love or hate, "it's because hate is close to love", Tsuna had replied, a tiny smile on his lips, "as long as you hate, you will think about that person till they fill you up completely, very similar to love yes?"_

"I hate you after all Sawada Tsunayoshi", Hibari whispered bitterly. He closed his eyes, because it was not in his nature to cry, yet something seemed to be in them, making his vision blurry. He was a man who could not even tell the person most important to him that he loved him, that's why there was no way he was crying.

_Tsuna looked at his family playing in the garden. "Hahaha, Lambo tripped and I-pin landed on him", Tsuna laughed. Hibari watched at his face, recently it always had a frown and worried eyes, but at the moment, Tsunayoshi's eyes were cheerful, and his smile could brighten up a dark room. "What did you call me here for Tsunayoshi?", Hibari asked in a flat tone. "Ne, Hibari-san, I love my family, don't you?", Tsuna asked out of the blue._

_Hibari snorted as he replied, "no." Tsuna turned around with a shocked expression, "eh? why Hibari-san? they're you're family too!"_

The herbivore had always loved his family. More than his own life. Hibari wondered why he did not see where this would lead him. 'Maybe I'm the one truly at fault', he thought, 'were you trying to tell me something during those times that you repeatedly called me to your room?'

_"You know Hibari-san, if I die, I hope it's only my body which will be trapped in the ground", Tsuna mused one day as he lay in bed with Hibari's arm around him. "What foolishness are you babbling on about now herbivore?", Hibari asked. "It's just...I really want my soul to fly in the sky, to be free. I'll tie my soul to the sky and watch over all the people I love", Tsuna giggled. _

It was a lie to say that clouds where free. Sure they could move freely, but they would _always_ be in the sky. Truthfully, it was the sky itself which was completely free, and it tied and binded everything else towards it and towards each other.

Hibari watched as one by one, the mourners started leaving. Soon it was just Hibari who was still there. "_Arrivederci_, Sawada Tsunayoshi", his voice was empty, his sky had taken away any bit of humanity, of feelings he had, "I love you."

_"I'll tie my soul to the sky and watch over all the people I love...especially you, Hibari-san."_

**A/N: **I dunno why but I felt like writing something sad XD hence this oneshot was born. I hope you enjoy it :)

Why is there no beta for this? Because...hmm, actually I don't know. but all my series' will have beta's coz those are top priority and shouldn't have too many mistakes :P


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